Why I Think Everyone Young and Old Should Read You Are Special

Children are surrounded by stickers we cannot see.

The stickers in the story are obvious. The ones children encounter in real life usually are not.

They come through grades, sports, friendships, social media, siblings, coaches, teachers, achievements, failures, appearances, popularity, talent, and comparison.

Even praise can become complicated if a child begins to believe, “I am valuable because I am good at this.”

Because then comes the obvious question: What happens when I am not?

What happens when someone else is faster? Smarter? Prettier? More popular? Gets the award? Makes the team? Scores higher?

Children need accomplishments. They need correction. They need standards. They need to learn how to work hard and how to improve. But those things should help shape what they do without becoming the measure of who they are.

And adults collect stickers too.

Children grow up, but the stickers do not disappear.

The labels simply change.

Adults are still praised, criticized, compared, overlooked, celebrated, judged, included, excluded, promoted, rejected, admired, misunderstood, and measured against other people.

We can collect our own stars through careers, parenting, appearance, money, accomplishments, relationships, popularity, productivity, or simply being the person who seems to have everything together.

And we can collect dots just as quickly.

A mistake. A failure. A relationship that ends. A job we do not get. Something somebody says about us. A season when we cannot do what we once could. A comparison we never meant to make.

The details change with age, but the temptation is remarkably similar: to let outside approval or rejection become an inside verdict.

That is why the message still matters.

There is nothing wrong with enjoying praise. There is nothing wrong with being proud of hard work. There is nothing wrong with wanting to do something well.

And correction matters too. We should be willing to learn, grow, apologize, improve, and change when change is needed.

But praise and criticism both become dangerous when we give them more authority than they deserve.

A compliment cannot make us more valuable. A criticism cannot make us less valuable. A trophy does not create worth. A failure does not erase it.

That distinction is one I wanted children to understand, and I think adults need the reminder too.

This mattered to me as a teacher.

One of the things I have always believed about education is that the child matters more than the system.

Students do not all learn at the same pace. They do not have the same strengths. They are not interested in the same things, and they are not supposed to become identical versions of one another.

A struggling reader is not a lesser child. A student who hates algebra is not a failure. The child who does not fit neatly into somebody else’s box is not a problem to be fixed.

That does not mean lowering expectations. It means separating performance from worth.

We can expect effort, teach responsibility, correct mistakes, celebrate growth, and still make sure a child understands that none of those things determine whether they matter.

Why I think this belongs in a homeschool library.

Homeschool families have a wonderful opportunity to build meaningful books into everyday education.

Not every book has to become a formal lesson. Sometimes the best thing we can do is read something together and talk.

This is one reason I have always preferred real literature as part of education. Stories can give children somewhere safe to encounter an idea before they have the words to explain how that idea appears in their own lives.

And I would hand this book to an adult too.

There are children’s books that become less relevant as we grow older. I do not think this is one of them.

Adults may understand the symbolism even more clearly because we have had more years to collect stickers.

We know what it feels like to be praised. We know what it feels like to be judged. We know what it feels like to succeed at something and suddenly wonder whether we can keep succeeding.

We know what it feels like to fail.

We know what it feels like when somebody’s opinion lands harder than it should.

Sometimes a simple story reaches places a lecture never could.

A book does not have to be long to stay with you.

There are books I read decades ago and barely remember. And then there are simple books whose message never really leaves.

You Are Special is one of those for me.

I read it to my children because I wanted them to know they were valuable before they won anything, earned anything, achieved anything, or impressed anybody.

I shared it with other children because every child eventually lives in a world that tries to hand out stars and dots.

And I recommend it to adults because most of us are still living in that same world.

Books can teach things worksheets cannot.

Reading together gives us opportunities to talk about character, choices, courage, kindness, mistakes, relationships, values, and ideas that do not fit neatly into a multiple-choice question.

That does not mean every book needs a worksheet afterward. Sometimes the conversation is the lesson.

You can find more books, learning tools, curriculum, and resources we think are worth considering on our Homeschool Favorites page.

And if you are thinking more broadly about curriculum and how to choose materials for the child in front of you, visit the HCS Resource Library or Faith Foundations .